My daughter had a victorian day at school today as part of her topic work for this term covering the Victorians. We were told a few weeks ago what they had to wear; a list for the boys and a list for the girls....well that in the first instance caused problems with her because she HATES wearing skirts or dresses and guess what the girls had to wear????? We spoke about the day with her therapist on a recent visit and it was decided she would go as a matchstick girl but dressed as a boy...she accepted this so thought it was fine.
We've been talking about the day coming up and I'm assuming the school have been working up towards it as well. The teachers were going to be dressed up as victorian teachers and were going to play the part by being really strict with them. She went into school fine but something must have happened during the day to make her not cope; obviously I'm going to have to talk to school to find out what happened over the day to break it down as to what it was that has set her off....oh the joy of dissecting a school day *sighs*
With her only telling you stuff on her terms I only found out just before teatime that apparently one of the teachers had said they were going to be given "gruel" at lunchtime but they weren't they had their normal school lunch meals; unfortunately because of the Aspergers she takes things literally so thought she really was going to be having "gruel" for her lunch so wasn't happy that this didn't take place. The teachers aren't at fault for this, they probably didn't realise how literally she takes things when you say them to her. Tried to explain to her that the teacher was only playing his part for the victorian day and that is what children would have had in those days; she just didn't get it and said she didn't find it funny and he shouldn't have said it if it wasn't going to happen....have a funny hunch its this small detail of the day that has set her off.
Since we came in from school she has been sniping/whinging/screaming at everyone if something happened that she didn't like even if it was something that normally happens in the normal routine of the day after school. When you have a child doing this for several hours it can be mentally tiring to deal with but today it was more so because her older brother has been unwell all day and he was biting and snapping back at her which of course hasn't helped anyone. Then add to this mixture her younger brother who wasn't happy because I told him his school friend couldn't come for tea as per arranged due to his older brother being ill. I met the younger one from school and explained to him straight away that his friend would have to come play another night; this induced a set of tears to form and fall down his face. My friend understand completely that her son couldn't come play with mine and we both explained that we'd arrange for another night for them to play together when everyone was well again.
So tonight has been "fun" in the loosest sense of the word *sighs* and I'm hoping that tomorrow will be a better day as its a non-uniform day due to Children in Need. I think the school are going to be doing different things throughout the day because of this charity day so I'm hoping she copes with it better than she has coped with today. Will have to inform the teacher before school starts about what has happened today.
I would have loved to show you how she looked when she was in her outfit but this morning we didn't have time and tonight she wouldn't allow pictures to be taken without a mouthful of abuse so gave up.....ho hum!!
Take care everyone and thank you for reading my rant :)
Oh hun, poor you, what a horrible shitty end to your day. I have an older cousin with the same problem, thats what the family call it, Barra's problem(?), he is now 52 and had been living independently since he was 30, his brothers and sister are around to help out so he is lucky. He did'nt get to go to a normal school, which is a shame, he went to a special school in Ireland. He got a lot of help after school and it took a long time but he is doing great. Just wanted to let you know that things can change for the good. xxxx
ReplyDeleteBlimey, I'm exhausted reading all that. It's a shame the school don't understand your daughter's condition better and do more to help her. But keep your chin up Heather, don't let the buggers get you down (authorities etc, not the kids LOL). I know this is probably a cliche you've heard a million times before, but things can only get better.
ReplyDeletecheers guys for the support.
ReplyDeleteAn update I didn't get chance to add to the bottom of this is that she laid in her bed screaming and crying which how most of her meltdowns finish off. She's on her second wind of this as I type.....she didn't like the fact that I said she could only cuddle 3 soft toys in bed instead of the 7 or 9 that she wanted! ho hum she'll cry herself to sleep because if i try and talk to her when she is like this she won't understand a word I say or being able comprehend what I'm trying to explain to her
sorry she's actually now gone quiet lol
ReplyDeleteoh hunny... *hugs* :(
ReplyDelete